A depth of feeling
carried each day
buried into the subconscious
of each witness, born into
each offspring, burned into
Questions will always outweigh
the answers when we attempt and
desire to look beneath the
surface, the material evidence,
the words and images – we want
the person’s thoughts, state
of mind, controlled actions, the
depth or lack of emotion.
The motivation. The why.
A snapshot of the moment’s impact.
What we all left behind
and what we are left with
incomplete and still searching.
Will closure ever come?
Even when we really do not
want to hear, the edge of
reason and the unknown can
only be walked for so long
before it takes over and consumes
and we free fall through the void
the dark night – or we accept
what is done, gather the pieces that
are left and attempt to rebuild.
calling to me. I guess I should back up from here. What is actually calling me, is me. My internal sense of where I am in life, how I live each day, is awake . It is uneasy with the current state of the within and without. It is pushing back to the surface all of the words I have spoken, all of my questions, everything I promised to myself, so that I may have the opportunity to review, reexamine, and make the next change. To take the next step, as I must remain faithful to myself, community, my sphere of influence, and the universe.
I have been at that edge, the sheer tip of the blade, where each decision, each moment is tenuous and crucial to happens next.
I have failed, and fallen off that tip.
I have shattered and through honesty and integrity, the glassmaker put me back together from the pieces and fragments I chose to keep.
I am ready to shatter again, so that I may rebuild, keeping what is healthy and useful, and discarding what is holding me back.
How will I find the glassmaker again? What plane of existence do they live within? The answer is easy, but the realization, the work, the pain, is the difficult part of the journey. The glassmaker is within.