Poem – More Questions Than Answers

That crossroad we come to
in moments of stress and blocks,
the struggle choking rational thoughts,
the behavior, the actions – this is not me.

How did this happen?
How did I get here?

Change is subtle and patient.
One day we vow to find balance,
to live and act a certain way,
to be, most importantly, better than
our-self yesterday.

Then time takes over,
and one winter morning, awake before the alarm,
thoughts are consumed with the upcoming day,
week, and months, items and events beyond
control, but consuming, pushing
away everything that is important, that matters.

Closing eyes tight, breathing, trying to push
this away and overcome the thoughts, but it has wrapped cold bony
fingers around the mind and wont let go.

I am losing sight of the path,
I am losing focus of the empty fields.

Each day folds into another as the weeks
and months pass with little notice
and soon another year rises beyond the horizon
and I am forced to confront where I am in this life
and if this is where I want to be, is this the path
I started down before?

How do I break from this cycle?
How do I wrestle back control and stake claim
to the life I am meant to live?

Poem – Escape Within Cartoons

Snow begins to cover the empty field
as the trees hold up the graying sky.

I want to bury my head into
the snow and mud,

I want to find a way into
the earth,

while I do not understand where
this world is going and the heavy thoughts,

and when I lift my head
I am living in a cartoon

where the scenesare surreal
and at the end we can erase

our actions and past
and start over.

Poem – Empty Fields

When this life’s pace and chaos
become too much I know where I can turn.

I return to my roots,
I return to the empty fields.

Here is a clean slate waiting
for the mind to create.

They offer possibilities,
an endless space to chase and capture dreams.

This is where the mind can exist
without limitations or boundaries.

This is home.

Poem – Path Home

The pine tree lined path
covered with early season snow
beckons for me to follow
and with eyes closed.

Poem – Becoming Winter

For now I am the winter
beneath the mask
revealed beneath the
cold water of the sea.

Eyes open to the sky
above the surface
breath held as snow begins.

For now I am the winter
overtaking the autumn
slowing rivers and lakes
the graying sky swallows the sun.

For now I am the winter
beneath tall trees
releasing snow and ice
as they bow toward the earth.

Emerging from the trees shadow
I stopped moving,
looked up at the winter sky
and finally breathed, inhaling
this world, this scene, and exhaled
what has been holding me back,
what has become the burdens I carry.

Today I became the winter.

Poem – Path Cast From Dreams

Emerging from the depths,
wrangling free from its grips,
I took the only path I knew,
the only path that still made sense.

Cast from recent dreams
the path wavered and moved
as I passed through,
the grey sky dripped

with bright colors painting
the trees and grasses.

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Poem – Direct Dreams

In the fractured sleep of night’s immersed
in dreams based in nothing familiar or known,
one word repeated over and over – direct.

I watched power-less as background images
of tall buildings, lattice, and cross-stitched patterns
rotated and approached my view with ever increasing velocity.

At the end (or beginning) of a tunnel
bathed in wavering light with no sound
a shadow slowly approached.

The sides of the tunnel began to
move and rotate, grey lines
and intricate patterns covered everything.

and I briefly lost sight of the shadow
until something pushed me through
and I landed on the empty fields

near the forest where we first
met in ancient times and you
silently spoke directly to me.